Telemental Health For Illinois Attachment Disorder

Telemental Health for Illinois Attachment Disorder

Telemental Health for Illinois Attachment Disorder  is now available for families struggling with attachment disorder.  I personally have 25 years of experience with kids with attachment disorder and families.  I have begun doing telemental health counseling because there is such a need. I just met someone yesterday who didn’t know I existed, although we were not that far apart in miles.  But I have had families drive 2 hours for a session because of the need for different kinds of therapy for these children.  

I am aware that the new terminology for attachment disorder is developmental trauma disorder, although it is not currently in the DSM 5.  Many families are just figuring out the old terminology of attachment disorder when trying to understand what is wrong with their child and why nothing they do works.

Symptoms of Attachment Disorder and need for telemental health


Telemental Health for Illinois Attachment Disorder

Telemental Health for Illinois Attachment Disorder is increasingly available right now from insurance companies because of our social distancing order.  We do not want to endanger children, families, or therapists, but know the need for support is great, even greater now.

The definition for Developmental Trauma Disorder is: Developmental Trauma is a term used in the literature to describe childhood trauma such as chronic abuse, neglect or other harsh adversity in their own homes. When a child is exposed to overwhelming stress and their caregiver does not help reduce this stress, or is the cause of the stress, the child experiences developmental trauma.(

Attachment Disorder: (RAD) is a condition in which an infant or young child does not form a secure, healthy emotional bond with his or her primary caretakers (parental figures). Children with RAD often have trouble managing their emotions. They struggle to form meaningful connections with other people. (Google)

Reactive Attachment Disorder: (RAD) is a condition in which an infant or young child does not form a secure, healthy emotional bond with his or her primary caretakers (parental figures). Children with RAD often have trouble managing their emotions. They struggle to form meaningful connections with other people. (Google)

Various types of attachment Disorder: two main types of reactive attachment disorder: inhibited and disinhibited. Not much research has been done on the signs and symptoms of this disorder beyond early childhood, however as children grow older they may develop either inhibited or disinhibited behavior patterns. (Google)

Illinois Attachment Disorder Telemental Health

Why Telemental Health for Illinois Attachment Disorder

Why telemental health – or telehealth therapy, using skype or another service such as zoom?  Ease of access. You need help. I understand that. And traditional therapy is NOT going to help.  This is not knocking traditional therapy, as I use different methods with different issues in an individual.  These kids will not respond to one on one in a room with a therapist. You will not get the truth. They will not change because they seemingly trust that therapist (they do NOT trust the therapist).  

I can provide many ideas, address many concerns you might have online from your home.  Scheduling is much easier. It can be a ½ hour session or a longer session. Some insurances now cover it. Many cover it now in this time of self-distancing with corona virus.    

There are not a lot of therapists working with this difficult issue.  I am one of those due to my experience. I have families that increase their frustration shopping around and at the same time, location is a problem.  With telemental health, it is not a problem.  

Telemental Health for Illinois Attachment Disorder Now More than Ever

So I hope you consider it for your own mental health.  Families living with attachment disorder are often traumatized frequently in many different ways.  It is my sincere hope that I can help a lot more families – often parents, especially mothers, feel better after the first session because someone truly sees them and understands them.  We all know how good that feels. 

Telemental health for Illinois Attachment Disorder – teletherapy – will increase access to services.

You can get services online currently through many insurance companies. Email me at if you would like to set up services.


Covid-19 and Kids With Attachment Disorder

Covid-19 and Kids With Attachment Disorder

Covid-19 and Kids with attachment disorder must be quite a combination in this time of self-distancing.  I’m not entirely sure where this post is going because this issue is very complex, but I’ll do my best.  It’s kind of like the whole self-distancing rule and the current state of our world. None of us know where that is going either.  And there aren’t many answers.

So perhaps the best way to go is to figure out how to help the families living with this situation. There are many jokes about there about families adjusting to homeschooling, etc. and the difficulties.  But for those of you parents living with Covid-19 and kids with attachment disorder, I need to ask “What can I do to help?” Perhaps you know better than I.  I can answer from my perspective as a therapist who understands the behaviors of these children and their goals.  And perhaps because I’m not living in the situation, I can be more objective.  I am offering teletherapy as always and it might be more valuable today than ever.

Why Use Teletherapy
Teletherapy is Available, due to distance or scheduling.

Covid-19 and Kids with Attachment Disorder

When I write this, please remember that I am not talking about children who do not have attachment disorder.  The issues that arise from that will be totally different during this time, and the issues of parents with these kids will still have struggles, but theirs will be different and I am not addressing them here.  If you live with attachment disorder in your household, you know the issues I’m talking about.  Manipulation, abusive behavior, lying, stealing, fighting, to name a few. So imagine having to battle that behavior for at least a month 24/7.  /

Covid-19 and kids with attachment disorder

What can families do when dealing with this covid-19 time? 

Tag team is important if possible, different caregivers taking responsibility and switching it up. Most important to be on the same page at this time, even if you don’t understand what’s going on.  Support the other caregiver.                                   Take time outside for yourself and also for the child with attachment disorder, separate from you.                                             They can be given chores outside.  You can even incorporate outdoor activities with school learning. 

We Can Help You!

You can also have someone else stay with child even though you may not want to because child cannot be trusted.  During this time, I see survival of the parent as primary.  In that case, you might have to break some of your rules i.e. let them play with a tablet, or let them watch a movie.                                                                                                                                    At this time, remember you need to survive first.  So is it more important for you to get a break and let them play on tablet, or is it more important to maintain rule of no electronics during this self-distancing time.                                                                If going to grandma’s means they come home obnoxious, but you can get a break, you have to weigh the consequences.  What if you got the weekend off? Not my decision – it’s one you have to make for you. 

The caretaker that receives the most abuse from the child is the one who needs to be nurtured so she/he is able to take care of the child.  Or able to make the best decisions.   

HELP Is Available.

During this crazy time of covid-19,  I am offering teletherapy services for parents and for children, and for educational purposes.  Please feel free to take advantage of this service during this time.  I use zoom and would be as simple as me sending you a link to your phone or email. You then click on the link.  Payment is best through paypal or google payment.   Call 815-398-8422 or email me at  I will keep an eye on things closely so I can be available.  I am also self-distancing so I LOTS of time right now.    



How Is Reactive Attachment Disorder Treated?

How Is Reactive Attachment Disorder Treated?

Treatment of RAD has two important goals. The first is to ensure that the child is in a safe environment. This is especially important in cases where the child has been abused or neglected. The second goal is to help the child develop a healthy relationship with an appropriate caregiver.

Treatment for RAD often focuses on the caregiver. Counseling may be used to address the issues that are affecting the caregiver’s relationship with and behavior toward the child. Teaching parenting skills also can help improve the relationship with the child and help develop attachment. Treatment may also include play therapy. This technique allows the child and the caregiver to express their thoughts, fears, and needs in the safe context of play.

There is no medication to treat RAD itself. However, the doctor may sometimes use a medication as an adjunct to treatment to help manage severe behavioral symptoms, such as explosive anger or problems sleeping.

Excderpt from>

How is Reactive Attachment Disorder Treated?

How is reactive attachment disorder treated?
Therapy Outside The Comfort Zone

This philosophy is also true in my practice.  The goal for the child is difficult when the behaviors are out of control.  “Loving them enough” is not going to solve the issues.  I believe that it calls for a black or white approach, which provides the structure needed.  Otherwise, the child can be very manipulative and parenting becomes increasingly difficult. *

This is when individuals who are not familiar with the dynamics in a home with children with extreme attachment disorder behaviors show how judgmental they can be.  Other adults  believe there are only certain ways to work with children. Therapists who don’t understand attachment disorder often judge my style of therapy also.  Traditional therapy does not work.

Children often hate me in the beginning of therapy because my allegiance is to their parents and the goal is that the child bond with their parents, not me.  I also do not align with manipulative behaviors. Children need to know that they can trust me to be strong, consistent, and unable to be played.  Again and again, this is with children who fit a certain criteria due to their early attachment trauma.  Children who lack any attachment and/or refuse to allow attachment with their current family. I do not use the same techniques in traditional therapy.

We will continue with more information re: ACE’s – Adverse Childhood Experiences

And Attachment Disorder Continues!

As I start to write this, I realize I haven’t written in a while. I have done other blogs but this one as gone by the side. My energy in attachment disorder therapy has waned somewhat. My clientele in this area is down as I have quit working with the state of Illinois post-adoption clients as they seem not to be paying me. I donated many hours at this point only to have the state decide not to pay me, much to the disservice of the families and children they have placed in families for adoption. I’m guessing services have been cut everywhere, every state. I’ve worked with families who have the breadwinner lose their jobs, had insurance cut, wages cut, etc. Meanwhile they have to live with kids who are sometimes impossible to live with. I know I get frustrated with the media, but I’m sure the families do even more so, because the perspective is not taking into account the actual behavior of these children, and how it impacts families. I remember when the woman put her adopted son on a plane back to Russia, with her mother’s support. They were in fear for their life, but the perspective of the press was “what a terrible thing to do, how could any mother give up on a child, etc.” Totally one sided. Those of us who knew what these children could behave like understood why she did it. Sometimes, it’s a basic case of survival. I don’t know that the world every will understand, and why are the families living with this disorder’s impact living that life. What is the purpose of it? Why them? I know sometimes they have something to learn from it, but I try to see some of this from a larger spiritual perspective, and I don’t really understand. What does a child gain from living such a life without a conscience, without love? Is their journey to learn to be loved, but they make it impossible? At least any intimacy in their relationships, as they will not let ANYONE in. And then what is my purpose? How much can I help? As I know I can’t often fix things as these kids are VERY resistant to therapy. I know I’m there to help parents and family members, and even the kids with AD, but… And how to continue with clients not having money to pay or subsidy money. Afterall, the DCFS director in Illinois cheated the state out of a great deal of money – better him than helping the kids and families, right?
So, at this point, I will continue online and will continue with consultation help. I am beginning to write digital books and articles. I am one of those people who does understand this behavior and it’s impact, and those of us who do need to be there to support the families and children. I will do what I can. I know there are many parents who are giving it their all, also in helping other parents survive through support networks. Thank you.

In the mind of the CWAD

Remember – CWAD is short for child with attachment disorder. As a therapist I often get involved in some mental gymnastics with my CWAD clients. They are OFTEN very intelligent and yet are very rigid in their thinking. The point of challenging them mentally is to help them see the illogical, irrational thinking they engage in. I certainly don’t expect results from this challenging, but I have seen some results. With these children, they often need frequent repetition to re-train their brain. My parent clients are always very frustrated at how these children do not get the message even though they may have heard something 1000 times or more while other children only need instruction a few times.
CWAD often enjoy manipulating people and triangulating and these issues often come up in therapy. One of the things I am best at is not being manipulated and this tends to make my child clients very angry. I tend to be pleased when children do not like me as a therapist, because that indicates that they know I know their tactics and the damage they are doing in the family. They also know they cannot come into my office and expect traditional therapy where they are listened to for their “sad” story, and getting off the hook for their bad behavior. That is not the case with a good RAD therapist. However, when my clients have moments of genuineness, the approach is very different.
Check out and

respite for Attachment Disorder children

Well, I am totally amazed that it has been soooooo long since I have been online. I have another job, but my, 10 months pass quickly. Please bear with me.
I have a wonderful foster/adoptive mom who has done some respite for families – she gets it and what a help for families with children with attachment disorder. they are not able to manipulate the situation and go home worse than before. This is a valid fear many families have.
This is all I’m writing tonite but I wanted to get started again. Please see my website at